~ Kartis and Kalam ~
Chapter one
Chapter two
Chapter three
Chapter four
Chapter five
Future life
Chapter six
~ Contact Kartis Shone ~
~ Kartis & Kalam, Chapter five ~
Chapter 5 - Future life
This time everything worked out right. The plane arrived, I met Richard at Kastrup airport in Copenhagen and we made it home again without anything bad happening to us. When Richard put down his bags in my bedroom he picked out a small box that he gave to me. There was a ring inside the box. He had bought it before he left Fresno for LA in September and had planned to propose to me in Copenhagen. He had kept the ring since then and this time he asked me to marry him. Of course I answered yes.
I worked full time still, and I left home at 7.30 every morning. Richard walked me to the bus every single morning from the first day he came here. I was so happy to have this wonderful man living with me. Both of us wanted so much to make him stay as long as possible. So, when two of the three months were gone we went to SIV to ask about residency for Richard. We got some forms to fill out and applied for another three months to start with. We thought that the longer we had known each other the easier it would be to get permission for residency in Sweden. When Richard went down to SIV to give them the forms, the lady there asked if he was planning to stay even longer than 3 months. Since she understood that this was what both of us wanted she told Richard to apply for permanent residency instead of only 3 months. So he did. But we had to wait until after his plane ticket was too old before we had an appointment for an interview with the investigator there. What would happen if they didn't give Richard residency in Sweden? We couldn't afford paying for a new airplane ticket. And they would probably have him leave immediately after their decision. Another horrible 2 weeks went by before we got the answer. Richard got his permission and now we could start to plan for the future!
We heard that the Swedish government changed the rules a few weeks after Richard got his residency. From the 1st of July 2000 it is no longer possible to apply for residency as long as you are in the country. You have to apply from your home country and stay there until you have got the answer whether you are given permission to reside Sweden or not. Thanks to the lady that Richard talked to the day he wanted to apply for another 3 months we were able to get his residency while he was staying in Sweden.
I have heard that American bureaucracy can be a tiring pain. Swedish bureaucracy is just as difficult, if not worse, to deal with. Starting a life as an immigrant in Sweden is like cutting your way through the jungle with a spoon. Many calls are to be called, many forms are to be filled in. And for an immigrant living with a Swede you may think it would be so much easier to make your way through this jungle. I guess it is in a way, and still not. The people you talk to think that I already know what to do and whom to call since I am Swedish. We got none information whatsoever where to call or where to go after Richard got his personal number and ID card. The only thing I knew was that he was supposed to get free Swedish classes for a year. But I didn't know how. Nobody could inform us about it. I found out from a lady at work who came from Russia. And the procedure for getting Swedish lessons wasn't the easiest to figure out. Cheezus!
Well, writing this it is already October 2000, and we have come further on our long journey through Swedish immigration bureaucracy and such. We love each other more and more for each day that goes by, and we are more than convinced that we were meant for each other. Richard started his Swedish classes two weeks ago, and already he can understand a whole lot, and even speak some Swedish. Our goal is now to save enough money for a trip to America and for our wedding.
I could have added lots to this "Saga of Richard and Cristin", but the story is already long enough. When we went through the hardest times of waiting to meet again we found some websites about people who met on the Internet and how they struggled to make it possible to live together. These stories gave us hope and strength to carry on a few more days without each other. I hope this story can be of some help for those of you out there who are in a similar situation. Meeting someone who lives on the other side of the planet is not easy. Getting to know someone on the Internet is a great way of learning about a person's inner self instead of getting blinded of a person's outside. How many of you fell in love with a good looking guy or girl, forgetting to find out if you loved the inside as well before you got involved too deeply?
Falling in love with someone on the Internet is also risky. When you meet in person you don't know for real if you will feel the same. If there is a large distance between you the expenses will be severe for travelling to each other. There is also this huge bureaucracy I have mentioned that is horrible to deal with. Before you decide to live together try to meet at least once - if possible. Try to "live together" for a few weeks to see if your love is just as strong as it was when you were talking on the Internet.
Richard and I were lucky (in all our misfortune) to find the one that we really love. We were lucky to like not only each other's insides, but also the looks of each other when we met. We have been blessed by God to meet and to be able to live together, and manage to survive so far. For the first time in many, many years I am happy and strong. I believe Richard feels the same.
~ Meny ~
